Built for dads, warriors, and spiritual field generals.
This isn’t just a hat—it’s a badge of survival and sarcasm.
With a pre-weathered brim and a battle-worn crown, this hat doesn’t pretend to be trendy. It earns its edge.
Throw it on after prayer, before rebuke, or during lawn warfare.
Pairs well with wisdom, side-eyes at woke nonsense, and kids who say “yes sir.”
⚔️ Specs:
100% pre-shrunk cotton twill (like your tolerance for weak doctrine)
Distressed brim & crown (because clean hats are for Instagram pastors)
6-panel unstructured fit with low profile
Adjustable hook & loop closure for judgment-day snugness
Embroidered TEOTWAWKI Pulse insignia – subtle, savage, sacred
“Because dad jokes save lives. And so does headgear with honor.”
This hat is made just for you once you order—like your dad’s advice: handcrafted, a little slow, but always right.
No stockpiles. No nonsense. Just on-demand honor stitched with grit.
